The Fearless Vampire Killers

An eccentric professor (Jack MacGowran) and his slow-witted assistant (Roman Polanski) struggle to free an innkeeper’s daughter (Sharon Tate) from the vampire, Count von Krolock.

Dance of the Vampires (The Fearless Vampire Killers or: Pardon Me, But Your Teeth Are in My Neck in the USA) is a wonderfully produced comedic homage to the vampire films of Hammer Film Productions. Unfortunately, it’s not very funny. At all.

Director/star Roman Polanski captures the atmosphere of the Hammer films perfectly, so much so that if he’d played it straight he could have potentially delivered the best Hammer film of them all, but the great production is wasted on pedestrian gags that, for the most part, neither spoof nor satirize the genre. Granted, there’s the flash of brilliance such as the clearly Jewish vampire being immune to a cross, but these bits are barely worth a chuckle, let alone a genuine laugh.

Compounding matters is the fact that the film’s protagonists, played by Jack MacGowran and Polanski, are utterly uncompelling. You have no interest in rooting for them, and even less interest in finding out what happens to them. They’re buffoons sure, but not loveable or engaging buffoons.

Polanski does compose some memorable shots, including a great one involving a mirror at a vampire ball, but it’s not enough to overcome the stilted attempts at comedy, making Dance of the Vampires a great film to look at, but a horrible one to sit through.